But I’m Not Ready To Wean
By Laura Silvas, RN IBCLC
The World Health Organization recommends exclusively breastfeeding for the first six months of life, up to 2 years, or beyond. However, people have different circumstances, different personalities, and different motherhood demands, which make it challenging to adhere to these recommendations.
Some women struggle to meet the six-month mark, while others hold tight beyond a year, and some moms are happy to make it long enough to return to work. Whether you set a breastfeeding goal or just went with the flow, we can all agree how disheartening it is when your baby starts weaning before you planned.
"It's not you; it's me."
As dramatic as it may sound, when your baby starts to refuse the breast and is no longer interested in the golden goodness that you've been preparing for them, it can feel like a breakup. Most of the time, it's a gradual decline. Shortened and distracted feedings, longer stretches between sessions, etc.
Knowing the subtle cues your little one is giving you may help ease the heartache as the realization hits that they may be ready to wean. It is not as common for babies to stop cold turkey; however, I have had a handful of moms tell me that they've experienced that. Again, every baby and nursing journey is different. As breastfed babies start weaning, they typically turn to comfort nursing when they are upset, for example, after falling, when they are sleepy, etc. Let these moments reassure you that your little one is growing independent but needs your comfort during those hard times.
What do I do now?
Moving from a full-force milk machine to feeling like you are no longer needed can leave both your heart and your body confused. However, there are still are a few uses for your precious milk:
Continue to produce: If you struggle to let go of what you fought so hard for, keep on! Be aware that to keep up with the supply and demand, you may need to pump more frequently when your little one isn't nursing. Watch for any signs of mastitis and clogged ducts. There are milk banks, breast milk donor pages, and several options for your milk. (Especially now in the US with formula shortages.) Of course, you can always continue to give your baby your milk, even if they've been cleared to move on to cow's milk or another alternative. Remember, just because they've surpassed a certain age, your milk is tailored to your child and still has incredible benefits! Introducing breastmilk into sippy cups, straw cups, etc., can be an excellent transition for both of you.
Slowly wean alongside your baby: Cutting down feeding sessions every few days will help decrease milk supply and hopefully avoid engorgement and dreaded mastitis. In this instance, hand expression is your friend. If your breasts are full and your baby is unwilling to nurse, hand expressing to comfort can semi-drain the breast without stimulating the response for further production. Cold packs and over-the-counter ibuprofen can help with comfort during weaning.
Take some time: Nursing frequency may come in waves for your little one, so go with the flow. If you are home, try skin-to-skin naps, and offer the breast frequently, including before meals. Soak up the moments between nap and bedtime when they are comfort nursing.
Be proud of yourself! Whether this is the end of your journey, an abrupt stop, or a gradual slow burn of weaning, you did it! Every drop you provided your baby with benefited both them and your body. You've dedicated your time and energy to providing your baby with the best nutrients possible. So write down your journey, treat yourself a little, encourage other moms, and remember that every drop counted.
If you are concerned or need help in any of these areas, please reach out to us here at Leva, and let us help you come up with a plan.
