How You Can Support Your Partner

By Laura Silvas, RN IBCLC

When mothers decide that they will be breastfeeding/or pumping, it often leaves their partners curious about their role. Partners may feel they lose bonding time with their babies or don't know how to support the breastfeeding journey. Here at Leva, we believe that breastfeeding can be a family connection. Here are some tips that will help the partners feel part of the feeding journey:

• Support the mother, which in turn supports the baby. For example, in the early days of breastfeeding, the mother and baby learn how to breastfeed effectively, or the mother may be trying to work out how to use a breast pump. Bring supplies such as pillows/boppy pillows, water, nipple cream, burp cloths, etc., all helpful tools she may need during a nursing or pumping session.

• Learn hunger cues. Breastfed babies metabolize breastmilk faster than formula-fed babies; because of this, they eat more often. Helping the mother watch for hunger cues such as rooting, bringing their hands to their mouth, or licking their lips can be very helpful. If your baby nurses on demand, this helps establish a good milk supply and leads to a happier baby. Sometimes, mothers may miss these cues while away cleaning, showering, napping, etc. Remember, crying is a LATE hunger cue, and getting a latch before your baby starts crying is preferable.

• Learn about her breast pump. Each breast pump is set up differently. Helping to put the pump together when it's time for her to pump or leave the house or being able to disassemble it for cleaning/sanitizing is also extremely helpful.

• Find times to bond with your baby. Your baby loves being skin to skin, and that includes you. Your partner will need a break or two; when she does, this is your turn to break out the cuddles.

• Feed the baby a bottle. If your baby is bottle-fed, your partner may prefer you do that while she pumps. Or, if you are in the process of introducing bottles, look into horizontal feeding. (Helpful hint: read our nipple confusion article). Sometimes, if the milk supply is well established, the mother may want to slip away for some quiet time, and this is an excellent time for you to take your baby.

• Wake up to help in the night. A helpful hand to change a diaper while the mother gets situated to nurse the baby means more than you know. Likewise, grabbing a change of pajamas if there is a diaper leak or bringing the mother a fresh glass of water are considerate things that help you be involved in caring for your sweet baby and partner.

• Encouraging words. Sometimes, a simple "You're doing such a great job feeding our baby" is what we need to hear to keep going when sleep deprivation hits hard.